what have i done to earn / achieve this glorious hair? i'm not sure. this might sound horribly cynical, but i don't think i can attribute it to anything i've done. i think this is just time passing and an icky disorder running its course.
i'm torn as to whether or not i should attach the less celebratory photos of how much hair i've lost on the right side of my head. i think for today, i'll leave it at this positive post of recovery.
3 cheers for hair!
Wonderful! That's such great news!
ReplyDeletehi, i just found your blog while researching alopecia. i'm from toronto too and i also have alopecia areata, but it's only manifested in two smallish spots. i am so scared of it getting worse, i just want to know (if you don't mind me asking) how you cope with it. thank you xx
ReplyDeletehey lily,
ReplyDeleteso sorry to hear you've got alopecia areata. how long have you had it? have you had spots that have grown in before? has a dermatologist diagnosed you?
to be honest with you, there are days that i really struggle with it, but i'd say most of the time i'm ok. around this time last year when my hair was falling out like crazy and it became apparent i'd likely have to get a wig - that's when i struggled the most. and like you, when i only had one or two spots at a time, i was terrified of the potential of it getting worse. and then it did get worse (way worse) and i got through it. it's been tough, but i'm doing really well. the fact that i was able to go to work, go out with friends, hold my head high and not let hairloss get me down, gave me more confidence in who i am. one of the greatest pieces of advice i've received is; "there's more to you than your hair.". of course when i first received that piece of advice, my reaction was "fuck you, you've got all your hair."... but when i really thought about it, i realized how true it is. this might sound cheesy, but make a list of all your amazing qualities, and when you feel shitty about your hair, focus on that list. or if you have a hard time coming up with lists of qualities that make you awesome, ask a friend or family member to help you with it. i bet your friends and family think you're pretty great. my next piece of advice is going to sound horribly cliche, but as someone who has lost about 30% of their hair, i feel i can get away with saying this: don't worry about it getting worse. take it one day at a time and focus on being present. if alopecia is in fact caused by stress / anxiety, the best thing you can do for yourself is not stress. if i'm feeling really worked up, i'll go for a jog or do something active to get some of that energy out. sometimes i write in my journal about how annoying it is to lose hair and not know when or if it'll come back. it's good to get worries out of your head - so put it on paper, tell a friend, or burn off some steam. be good to yourself - eat well, rest lots, do things that make you happy. i also constantly remind myself about how lucky i am that i'm losing my hair because of alopecia, and not because of some big awful beast like cancer. i'm so thankful for my health, and i try to focus on that a lot. sometimes i struggle with feelings of envy when i see women with full heads of natural hair (and envy is an icky, icky feeling) in those moments i try to remind myself that nobody is perfect and those women have struggles of their own.
i hope that didn't sound too preachy and that i helped a bit. i'm pretty good at giving pep talks, so feel free to email me anytime. i truly hope your hair smartens up and stops falling out, but i promise you that even if it doesn't, you'll be ok. hang in there.
the first time it came around was about 3 years ago, when I was 16. that time there were 2 smallish spots but this time there are 3 bigger ones. sometimes when i'm out i get paranoid about whether it's being properly covered by my other hair. not a fun way to live :( there's quite a bit of little hairs growing in the spots, but my hair is still falling off quite a bit. it's likely that it'll stop falling off, right? sometimes i just want to shave all of it off and wear a wig, but i'm not brave enough to do that :P
ReplyDeletedon't worry about sounding preachy, i appreciate pep talks! your blog is awesome, btw.
I wish I could say that your hair will stop falling out, will grow in thicker than ever and you'll receive a lifetime supply of chocolate for being so brave, but unfortunately I can't. BUT I can say that no matter what - you'll be ok. It might be challenging, but you'll be ok.
DeleteCan you use powdered eyeshadow in a colour that's similar to your hair colour to fill in any sparse areas? And congrats on the tiny new hairs! That's a really good sign.
DeleteI love your blog! I have alopecia
ReplyDeleteareata too. I am a guy but it still really sucks as I have lost half my hairline in the front. Anyhow your sense of humor and witt made me laugh and feel better. I also really admire your strength and ability to put things in perspective.
Francesco
francesco! thanks so much for your super sweet comment! sorry about your super sucky hair loss. :(
Deleteany signs of regrowth?